Seeing God as some distant rule maker and the Bible as a weighty list of restrictions are common Christian beliefs. But, God is not about rules and regulations; he seeks relationship.

And, if we are in that relationship with God, we'll want to know how to live in a way that pleases him. And if we trust his judgement, his warning that the ways of this world can often be dangerous or wrong is one we'll want to hear: 'Be very careful, then, how you live - not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil' (Ephesians 5:15-16 NIV).

God is keen on us living a certain way. God doesn't need a relationship with us, he wants it, out of love, so it makes sense that he has our best interests at heart. Add to that that he knows absolutely everything that can be known, and his opinions become very trustworthy.

When God says things like, 'live wisely', 'do not gossip', 'get filled with my Spirit, rather than getting drunk' (Ephesians 5:15-18), it's because he wants us to avoid hurting ourselves and others. So, let's not 'conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of [our] mind' (Romans 12:2 NIV).

So what now? Be deliberate about doing things wisely for God. Challenge yourself to make a positive change in one area of your life, whether in attitude, habit or behaviour. God loves you and wants to help you live carefully.

Sometimes it can feel like everyone has expectations of us. Our parents want us to be successful. Our friends want our attention. Our tutor wants us to knock that essay out of the park. People's expectations can weigh us down, and if we spend all our time trying to please people, we'll never be free. If we're constantly trying to fulfil other people's expectations, as well as our own, we'll end up crumbling because we didn't accomplish all they or we wanted. We could make a list of priorities and number them from one to ten, but that could stress us more because priorities can change within minutes.

Stop. Consider this... Everything was made through God: 'without him nothing was made that has been made' (John 1:3 NIV). To find balance in our daily lives, we must put God at the centre of everything we do. Our number one priority should be him. And that priority shouldn't change.

Even if it sounds a bit clichd, it's the truth. The only way to anchor ourselves in the face of a bazillion expectations is if our No.1 aim is to live for, and with, the Constant One. With God at the root and centre of everything, the pressure to decide which human expectations to carry becomes less and less.

So what now? Think about someone who's expected a lot from you. Even if it's difficult, thank them for what you learned from them, and take them a gift, if you can. Then, thank God that he has taken the load of expectation from you.

Comparisons are usually dangerous. We are meant to be different. What someone's good at, we may not be. To put it in terms of our Christian walk, when we notice a friend's great prayer life/volunteering/worship leading, it's tempting to wallow in 'why am I not as awesomely godly as that' negativity. But, God gave each of us specific talents, abilities and passions. If we live our lives striving to match others, we'll burn out or miss what God has for us.

What brings someone close to God is different for each person. Let's not allow the great stuff in others' lives to become damaging to our own. Others' good habits aren't there to weigh us down. If someone gets up at dawn to pray, let's be encouraged to pray more. But doing that at 5am isn't what makes a 'good Christian'.

So, getting to a point where we can say 'I take joy in doing your will, my God' (Psalm 40:8 NLT) won't happen while we're trying to keep up with what others are doing. It happens when we live out our faith in the way God designed for us. If we find one way of praying difficult, let's find one that we love. When our God-given-preferences get in sync with our God- time, it's a win:win.

So what now? What's something you love doing? Do it in a way that'll bless someone else (e.g. if you love photography, invite someone who's lonely to go with you to take shots of great scenery). What has God given you?

When we invite God into the areas of our lives that need changing, he loves getting to work. And being real with him is the way to start. But he's a gentleman. He waits for us to invite him in. He wants us to ask him to change us, to lead us, and to do his will. All of that is God's work to do, and our place is to ask for it. Sounds easy, right?

Not exactly. It means acknowledging our flaws first. Even when we know, deep down, that something's not how it should be, it can be so hard to confess it out loud. We can get good at acting like everything's okay. But it's not worth it. There's nothing wrong with admitting to a weakness. Romans 7:14-25 charts Paul's own admission of his weaknesses, and it includes great acknowledgements of God's grace at work.

So, let's not pretend to be doing great when we're wrestling with that-thing-we-shouldn't-do. Let's stop pretending to be interested in something we're not. It's just... exhausting. And we don't need to do it. Let's be who we are, in front of God, and in front of the world. It's when we admit that we need to be led 'on level ground', that we find ourselves doing more and more of what God wants.

So what now? Chat to a good friend about any areas in your life you'd like God to change. Be transparent and share your hearts. Then commit those areas to Jesus to do his miracle levelling work in.

We may tell someone about a worry we have, and get a response like, 'Yes, well, worrying is normal'? That's nearly true: worry is something loads of people do, so in that way it's 'normal'. But not for us. We Christians get a 'new normal', more than whistling, 'Don't worry, be happy' through our problems. Philippians 4 says we get to tell God everything we're stressed about, and instead of hearing, 'Oh, that's just normal human behaviour', we hear, 'There's no need to worry anymore.'

As followers of Jesus, we get to share in his peace. Jesus' peace wasn't a floaty idea or a 'good vibe'. No, Jesus' peace came from his relationship with his Father. Jesus knew for sure that his Father would give him everything, so he didn't have to worry about not having what he needed or being in the wrong place. What's our way into that peace? Pray. When we give every little situation and detail to God, he'll give us a peace that no one else can.

If we want to experience a life free of worry and filled with peace, let's let go of any control we possess over a situation (let's be honest, it's never that much control anyway) and say, 'Here God, here are my problems, worries and troubles. Help me through them and give me your peace.'

So what now? After you've released your worries to Jesus, think about someone you know who is worrying and pray for them to find God's peace in their situation.

Sometimes we can struggle to see God at work in our lives, even though he's worked in it in the past. We can struggle to pray and read our Bible, even though we want to. It happens. Let's not self-condemn, saying, 'I'm not holy enough... I'm not praying hard enough...' (fill in as appropriate). Sometimes, we get tired: physically, mentally or emotionally. Have we had enough sleep lately? Have we been going through draining or overwhelming times? All these things affect us.

The amazing Gospel news is that, incredibly, Jesus offers us salvation, healing and life in him, and there's nothing we can do to earn that. If we've said 'yes' to that, brilliant. If we've slipped back into thinking that we must work to earn his attention, then something needs to be re-aligned. Giving Jesus the reins is the solution. He brings joy and purpose to life. He will 'refresh the weary and satisfy the faint' (Jeremiah 31:25 NIV). He can give us peace, rest for our minds and bodies, and healing (sometimes straight away, sometimes over time).

If running to Jesus seems too hard for right now, let's try this: let's ask him to come to us, to push through all the stuff that weighs us down. Just wait... he'll come to us. He's right with us.

So what now? You don't have to work to get God's attention. He is always right with you, waiting for you to ask him. Thank him for that.