A pastor wrote: 'According to legend, King Midas loved gold so much that when Dionysus granted him a wish, Midas asked that everything he touched would turn to gold. At first, Midas was delighted with his request, but when he discovered that his touch made food inedible and his embrace made loved ones lifeless, he stumbled upon what sociologist Robert Merton called the law of unintended consequences. Like Midas, getting what we want can result in...undesirable consequences... Sometimes an unanswered prayer is God...sparing us the pain of unintended consequences...Most of the time that causes us a great deal of temporal angst, but someday we will owe God as many thank-you's for the prayers he did not answer as the ones he did.'

He continues: 'Many of our prayers are misguided. We pray for comfort instead of character. We pray for an easy way out instead of the strength to make it through...Many of our prayers would short-circuit God's plans and purposes for our lives if he answered them. Maybe we should stop asking God to get us out of difficult circumstances and start asking him what he wants us to get out of those difficult circumstances.'

So what now? This is God's heart for you: 'I know the plans that I have for you...They are plans for peace and not disaster, plans to give you a future filled with hope' (Jeremiah 29:11 GWT). Thank God for the prayers he answers and those he doesn't!

First, let's acknowledge our inadequacy to God. Joni Eareckson Tada says, 'Deny your weakness, and you will never realise God's strength in you.' God told Paul, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my strength is made perfect in weakness' (2 Corinthians 12:9 NKJV).

Second, let's stop putting ourselves down. We may think, 'I don't have the qualifications to do the tasks God's given me.' God doesn't call the qualified, he qualifies the called. Here's how: 'I will pour my Spirit on everyone. Your sons and daughters will prophesy. Your old men will dream dreams. Your young men will see visions. In those days I will pour my Spirit on servants, on both men and women' (Joel 2:28-29 GWT). God isn't limited by age, gender, race or academic status. The only thing that limits him is the limit we place on ourselves or allow others to.

Third, let's not buy it. Advertisers spend billions of dollars trying to convince us that without their product we're inadequate or incomplete. Not true! We are 'fearfully and wonderfully made' (Psalm 139:14 NKJV). Fourth, let's see others' excellence or superior performance as motivation and inspiration, not intimidation. Meanwhile, let's not lose sight of our unique gifts We are gifted, even if we can't see or accept it yet. 'Having then gifts differing according to the grace that is given to us, let us use them' (Romans 12:6 NKJV).

So what now? You may not realise your sufficiency with God yet, but it lives within you. Believe it and use it.

The feeling of inadequacy is a state of mind where we think our best is not good enough. It often starts in childhood when our parents, teachers, or others we considered important, failed to appreciate and affirm us or compared us negatively to someone else. No statistics can measure the number of dreams abandoned because of this emotion.

Paul writes: 'By ourselves we are not qualified in any way to claim that we can do anything. Rather, God makes us qualified. He has also qualified us to be ministers of a new promise, a spiritual promise, not a written one' (2 Corinthians 3:5-6 GWT).

Many of the Bible heroes struggled with feelings of inadequacy, so we're not alone! Moses told God, 'I can't go and talk to Pharaoh, send someone else' (see Exodus 3:11; 4:13). The real story of these Bible heroes is that they didn't let their fear rule them, and they said yes to God. They stepped out in faith and said in essence, 'Lord, I am depending on you for my success.' Our human ego likes to look good and claim the credit. But God puts us into a position of dependence on him so that the credit for our success goes to him - and that makes an amazing testimony for our lives!

So what now? Consider these two truths: (1) Without God, you are inadequate. (2) Infused with God's strength, you are adequate to any challenge he calls you to face.

There's no magic trick when it comes to influencing and impacting others. The Bible gives us the formula: (1) Try to listen carefully. The truth is that people don't care how much we know until they know how much we care. They tend to filter what they hear through their own life experiences, hang-ups and the particular problem that's on their mind at that moment. So if we want people to listen when we speak, let's listen carefully to them.

(2) Don't say too much. If we tend to talk too much, or too fast, here are three tips to slow down: (a) Stop. Just stop talking. Take a breath. Count to ten, then excuse ourselves and take a break. (b) Practise not interrupting. Let the other person finish what he or she is saying. (c) Let's ask ourselves why we're talking so much. Is it insecurity? Or anxiety? Or a need to control? Or a desire to impress? The reason many of us try to convince, impress or control is because we have a hard time trusting God to work things out. Let's just deliver the message and trust God to do the rest.

(3) Keep anger in check. If we implement the first two principles, we will tend to do fine on number three. It will just happen.

So what now? The good news is, you can learn to listen, be slow to speak and slow to anger. And as you practise them, you'll be amazed at the impact you have for God.

Charles Plumb was a pilot in Vietnam. After seventy-five combat missions, his plane was demolished by a surface-to-air missile. Plumb ejected, parachuted into enemy hands and spent the next six years in a Communist prison. He survived the ordeal and now lectures on what he learned from his experience. One day he and his wife were sitting in a restaurant. A man from another table walked over and said, 'You're Plumb! You flew jet fighters in Vietnam from the aircraft carrier Kitty Hawk. You were shot down!' Plumb said, 'How in the world did you know that?' The man replied, 'I packed your parachute.' Then the man grabbed his hand and said, 'I guess it worked!' Plumb assured him it had: 'If your chute hadn't worked, I wouldn't be here today.'

That night Plumb couldn't sleep. How many times had Plumb seen him without even asking, 'How are you?' - or anything else - because Plumb was a fighter pilot and the other man was only a sailor. He thought about the many hours that sailor had spent in the bowels of the ship, meticulously weaving the shrouds and folding the silks of each chute, holding in his hands the destiny of a stranger. As a result, Plumb routinely asks his audience: 'Who's packing your parachute?'

We all have someone who provides what we need to make it through the day. Paul said Phoebe 'has been helpful to many, and especially to me (Romans 16:2 NLT)'.

So what now? Who helps you? Today show them your appreciation.

Desperate situations sometimes call for desperate measures, and cutting the supply line to our earthly nature means getting radical. Jesus puts it like this: 'If your right eye causes you to sin, poke it out and throw it away. It is better to lose one part of your body, than for your whole body to end up in hell' (Matthew 5:29-30 CEV). Seems pretty drastic! But what Jesus is suggesting is moral and spiritual surgery - and that's radical!

It's impossible to argue, reason or negotiate with sin. Whatever our personal battle with temptation is - alcohol, drugs, device usage, wrong relationships, pride, food - its purpose is to destroy us. So we need to destroy it and overcome.

The apostle Paul was familiar with Old Testament Scripture. He knew that Samson fell while Joseph stood strong when faced with similar temptations. That's why he wrote to his spiritual son, Timothy, warning him about the sin that could disqualify him and keep him from winning the race: 'Run from temptations that capture young people' (2 Timothy 2:22 CEV).

So what now? Life is saturated with seductive influences, which means you can't always eliminate the source. So Paul told Timothy (and now you!) - when you can't remove the influence, remove yourself! And run, don't walk. You can be free, but your earthly mind will only give you a few seconds before it decides for you. So don't hesitate, don't try to make excuses, and don't procrastinate. Do what needs to be done - and do it quickly. You are made to live free.